Many bands have been around longer than our own parents. Some because they deserve it and still kick it with attitude, others only offer us the unpleasant feeling of vicarious embarrassment. Also in Finland there are plenty of Rock’n’Roll grandpas (those beyond 50), that missed the last bus home. We have checked (not quite so seriously) possible future candidates that will most likely still rock the stages far beyond their best-before day.
Almost two decades as a band and still the album and EP machinery works smoothly like a gear wheel. Being Finland’s greatest export star in terms of Grindcore the interest probably won’t fade, as they shamelessly recycle their old material for years now anyway.
After countless years of trying to break through and shifting from Gothic Rock to Nu Metal, this band is still trying to - well, break through. The quality of their songs decreased while the speed of sound went up. Yet every second year they pop up with a new miserable attempt of uninspiring tracks and a waste of Mika Taurianen’s vocal range. You could almost feel pity for them.
Happily thrashing their way through the Finnish woods for ages, but not aging a bit themselves. With the invention of catchy choruses this band earned itself another 15 years in allowed existence. In case 14 year old Metal newbies don’t want to listen to them either anymore, they have provided for their future by founding their own label Sakara Records, which will bestow us with wacky weirdos and fill their pension fund in great numbers. Perhaps someone should finally tell those Finns that Marko Annala is not Jesus, so they don’t have to have to god him till the end of times.
This band is felt active since the early days of mankind, and just days before their date of expiry they got a shot at fame, thanks to Marko Hietala’s new employer Nightwish. There are various rumours that the bodies of the Hietala Brothers were found decades ago and got re-mummified. Therefore no touchy touchy, otherwise you can throw their ashes to the stars…
After Sentenced wisely called it quits to spare us and them blushes, Ville Laihiala just couldn’t let go and formed Poisonblack. The first years went really well and almost made us forget why Laihiala is a notorious reminder for all kids why one shouldn’t drink. But, when you thought he finally drank the last bad song idea, he announced his soberness. Doesn’t help though, if not even the sound got worse. So for the next 20 years he’ll try and try and try and try and zzzzzzzzzzzz…
With Jari Mäenpää’s speed, we will be lucky to have the long-awaited second album by the end of 2060.
Seemingly they are around since the beginning of times. Growing adult they went from evil to semi-evil, using every bit of Kalevala they can get their fingers on. When the epos is consumed, they probably find their gold in other lovely heroic sagas.. or German fairy tales, Greek idols…
Unless someone forbids her to cover “Over The Hills and Far Away” and people still settle for a Tarja concert to satisfy their former unfulfilled Nightwish dreams, this nightingale won’t stop screeching. Pardon, singing. Maybe if they stop producing microphones in all kinds of funky colors, or she finally notices that moshing does not make her heavy... She’ll be Finland’s own Doro Pesch.
Is there really more to say?
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Last Updated (Friday, 03 February 2012 13:16)
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