My first real change of heart happened after I met him. Back then I was around 20 and one could have easily called me naive, good-natured and a lil crazy. Who else would fall in love with someone, get her heart broken and then sob for months to the music of the band of the guy who caused everything? Almost five years later I’m wiser of course, yet again my very own iconcrash pt. 2 knocked on my door…

We girls often tend to put too much emotion into our doings and then wonder why we get hurt. Especially, if there’s a musician involved. And it almost seems to begin when we turn teens, whether it’s the Backstreet Boys, Justin Bieber or Bring Me The Horizon. There’s this natural obsession with hot guys no matter the genre and sometimes we girls can’t handle it. So far so good. But we all know it can get out of hand and the one or the other always searches for the edge, then we wonder why we’re called groupies when just asking for a signature… And on the other hand, do Rock and Metal boys do that? The industry is male-driven, so who would they fall for besides Cristina Scabbia, Angela Gossow and Doro Pesch? So yet again we females seem to be lonely riders on this field…

At least I know for sure I’m to blame for myself. Where I was stupid and blue-eyed years ago I’m more grounded and rational now. I noticed, as more or less part of a scene, that sadly as a single woman you’re hanging out with your Metal friends much more compared to being in a happy fulfilled relationship. Gone seem the days of whiskey all night long and collective undressing on the market place, they’re replaced by simple “hey”’s and “what’s up”, once a year a birthday greet via Facebook and the compulsory Like-for-Like at mutual benefit (but that’ll be a topic worth discussing separately).

Therefore I thought that especially around people you’ve been knowing for years now I can exist on a deep friend-to-friend base. But nope, again proved wrong, I’m not as mature as I’d like to be. When one of Finland’s most successful Metal bands visited Henry’s Pub, Kuopio again I had my latest wake-up call. After having talked for a while, and mentioning that I was in a relationship, I was left alone with the comment “Then I ain’t got no more business in here”… W-w-wait?! Weren’t we just chatting about everything under the sun? Nice to know once again that character, friendship and years of loyalty don’t mean shit to some people.

For a second time I felt like a complete dork not seeming to understand how our world is moving (and my three tipsy complaining calls shall not be mentioned). One of my favourite bands, a friend I thought I had a connection with just battered within three seconds. Guess I really sometimes am still the same naïve girl. A few weeks have passed now and I haven’t heard from him, but I don’t find it as crucial or hurtful anymore as I used to… but of course I’m a fan now of the real Iconcrash.